Does your husband feel appreciated? Do you need help showing your gratitude? In this post, you’ll learn how to appreciate your husband (and show it!) by making simple and lasting changes.
This post is unique because it goes into some deep levels of appreciation. You’ll find tips that will help you make a true change in your marriage.
- How does appreciation help my marriage?
- How do I make my husband feel appreciated?
- How to appreciate your husband in words
- How to appreciate your husband quotes: What do you say to your husband to show you appreciate him?
- How do you show value to your husband?
- Thanking your husband for being a good father
- Prayer to appreciate my husband
- Final thoughts: how to appreciate your husband
How does appreciation help my marriage?
Appreciation in marriage can do so much good.
Think about a time when you cooked a big meal for your family. Were you thanked for the food? How did it make you feel?
Now imagine having that feeling with anything you do. Or even for just being you. Your husband wants those feelings too.
Making a habit out of appreciation can also help you get through tough times. No marriage is perfect and every relationship is bound to struggle at some point. But if you have strong appreciation in your marriage, you will have a solid foundation to lean on.
Once you have kids, you need to divide and conquer a lot. There are times when the division of labor will not be equal. These are the moments when you need to support each other and show your appreciation.
For example, if your husband travels for work, you’re responsible for the house and the kids. You and your husband are both doing your part to take care of the family. You both need to recognize and appreciate each other for it.
How do I make my husband feel appreciated?
Making your husband feel appreciated goes beyond saying thank you for the things he does. If you want to truly make your husband feel appreciated, you need to go deeper. Make him feel valued for who he is and how he acts. Be grateful for the big and little things. Follow the steps below to deepen your appreciation of your husband!
Appreciation for your husband is twofold: truly appreciating him and showing it.
The steps below will focus on both of these important details. They will help you appreciate your husband on a whole new level.
1. Ask your husband if he feels appreciated
This is an important first step because you need to establish a baseline. You need to figure out where you currently stand. Here are some good questions to ask:
- Do you feel appreciated by me?
- Are there any areas that you wished I’d show a little more appreciation of?
- Are there any areas that I show you appreciation well?
You may think you appreciate your husband but if he doesn’t feel it, you’re only halfway there.
One more note: if you feel like your husband expects praise for everything, that might be your first clue that you’re not showing enough gratitude. Get deep and figure out where you need to make changes.
2. Notice the little things
When I’m trying to show more gratitude, I start by noticing things to appreciate about my husband.
Your husband does so many little things every single day that you should be appreciative of. Stop and notice them.
Does he always make the bed? Or pour your cup of coffee for you?
3. Remind yourself of the big things
The big things are easier to notice. But do you remind yourself of them?
What are some big things you appreciate your husband for? Josh works a job and a half so that I can stay home with our 2 kids. I’m unbelievably grateful to him for that. I consistently remind myself that I’m thankful for my husband for this huge gift.
4. Consider his character
We begin to go deep with this step. Do you appreciate your husband for who he is? Here are some things to consider:
- What drew you to him when you were dating?
- What character traits did you value?
- What character traits have you come to adore?
5. Make a list
Now that you’ve been doing the steps above, it’s time to make appreciation a part of your daily habits. Write it all down from the steps above.
I find that making lists helps me a lot. But if you have a different method, feel free to substitute it here. The point is to do whatever you need to do to keep all of these thoughts together so you don’t forget.
6. Create a lasting habit
The best way to begin a new habit is to start small and implement sustainable changes. So let’s start there. Here are some small things you can start doing now:
- When your husband does something small, point it out.
- Every day, pick something from your list and thank your husband for it.
- Put a stack of post-it notes by your bed. Write down a quick but loving note to surprise him with.
- Talk to your kids about all of the amazing things your husband does. Including them in this habit will make your husband feel even more loved. (More on this topic below.)
- If you really need help remembering, set some alarms on your phone. Start small, with just one alarm. As you get used to the habit, add another alarm. Eventually, you won’t need reminders at all. Appreciating your husband will become second nature.
7. Brag about your husband
There’s a lot of negativity in the world. Sadly, there are also a lot of wives who will complain about their husbands. Don’t be one of them.
You don’t need to go overboard with this. Just make it a point to say nice things about your husband. Tell your friends, coworkers, and family members.
8. Consider his love language
Everyone experiences love differently. There are so many different ways to express gratitude. Consider your husband’s love language when coming up with ideas.
Here are a few husband appreciation ideas, based on the different love languages:
- Acts of service: Show your husband how much you appreciate his hard work by doing a few extra chores this week (especially the ones he doesn’t like as much!). Or you could take the kids out of the house for a couple of hours and let your husband have a peaceful house. He’ll appreciate the gesture.
- Receiving gifts: Choose a gift that has meaning behind it, that shows your appreciation. For example, let’s say your husband has been making dinner every night. You’ve noticed he could really use a particular kitchen gadget. This would be a great way to show how appreciative you are of his meals. If your husband has been working long hours, a relaxing gift might be more appropriate.
- Quality time: Book a babysitter and spend some quality time with your husband. Is there a movie he’s been excited to see at the theater? Take him and splurge on a dinner afterward.
- Physical touch: Make sure you reach for his hand a lot – the sweet gesture of holding hands will mean a lot to him. If you want a bigger gesture, give your husband a nice massage or a foot rub after a long day.
- Words of affirmation: This is one of the most common and easiest ways to show your husband you appreciate him. The rest of this post is dedicated to this love language type so keep reading! 🙂
You can learn more about love languages here.
How to appreciate your husband in words
Many show and feel appreciation through words. Therefore, I’ve dedicated most of this post to using words to show appreciation.
The easiest and fastest way to show your husband appreciation is to tell him.
How to appreciate your husband quotes: What do you say to your husband to show you appreciate him?
Here are some beautiful messages that you can adapt and use for your husband. Use these as a starting point to help give you more ideas. Make sure you take the time to come up with your own!
- Thank your husband for something he did this morning:
- “Thank you for making the bed today.”
- “Thank you for getting the coffee ready. I can’t start my day without it.”
- Thank your husband for something he did this afternoon:
- “Thank you for having lunch with me.”
- “Thank you for folding the laundry and putting it away.”
- Thank your husband for something he did this evening:
- “Thank you for taking the trash cans to the curb.”
- “Thank you for helping our son with his homework.”
- Thank your husband for something small, but nice that he did for you:
- “Thank you for pouring my coffee into my favorite mug.”
- “Thank you for giving me 30 minutes to myself so I could decompress after work.”
- “Thank you for holding my hand while we watched tv.”
- Thank your husband for some of the big things:
- “Thank you for working so hard for us. We have a nice house and good food because of you.”
- “Thank you for supporting me in my career.”
- “Thank you for supporting me in the decision for me to stay home with the kids.”
- Show appreciation for the character traits that you love:
- “I’m really grateful you are so selfless. You are teaching our kids great values.”
- “You have a very kind heart. I love how you always look out for me.”
- Thank your husband for being an awesome partner:
- “I’m so glad I married you. You make me laugh every day.”
- “I love how you include me in big decisions. You make me feel like a true partner in our marriage.”
- “Thank you for loving me.”
How do you show value to your husband?
Make your husband feel valued by taking care of him and looking out for his needs. Show him appreciation by listening to his struggles and helping him through this.
Thanking your husband for being a good father
One of the most important jobs your husband has is being a father. We all criticize ourselves as parents and don’t feel like we live up to our expectations. Begin to notice and appreciate your husband for the good father that he is. Chances are, he needs to hear some encouraging words from you.
Your husband is going to have times when he feels like he has failed as a parent. This is a wonderful time to appreciate your husband for being a good father. It’s when he needs to hear it the most.
When your husband falls short, remind him of all the ways he is a great father. Encourage him to do better next time but to not beat himself up about what happened.
Don’t forget to include your kids in this appreciation. Your kids need to see you being grateful for their father. Talk to them about it often. Encourage them to show appreciation in their own ways.
Prayer to appreciate my husband
Connect Again is not a religious marriage blog. However, I value the fact that religion plays a deep role in many people’s lives. Mine included. If you need extra help in appreciating your husband, I’ve written the prayer below:
Guide me on this journey of appreciation
In valuing my husband and our marriage
Open my eyes to the little things my husband does
Help me notice the big things
Allow my heart to open to a new level of appreciation
And express it
Allow my husband’s heart to open and feel loved
Help me be an example for my kids
So that they may show appreciation too
Final thoughts: how to appreciate your husband
In the end, pay attention to your husband and point out things you notice. It’s as simple as that.
How do you show your husband appreciation? Let me know in the comments below. I’d love to hear what you thought of this blog post!